[post by randomvis]
I’m going to cop flak for this— but I don’t care.
I don’t even care if I ruin this pub favourite. The truth is more important.
This has gnawed away at me ever since I sat eating a chicken parmi and realized my son’s kid’s meal, nuggets + chips + salad and sauce is just a miniaturized concept. Rather, the parmi is just the ‘adultified’ version of the nuggets. You can @ me if you want to argue about the nuances about additional mozzarella, the difference between the sauces or even the number of nuggets versus the size of parmi, but I won’t respond. You and I both know now you are eating a kids meal and you need to grow up.
One thing remains constant, crumbed chicken, sauce, chips and salad.
You can’t run from it, you are eating a kids meal dressed in an adult’s name.
I don’t care.
When you’ve been floodlocked in the bush for two weeks, rationing your food, repositioning camp out of flooded areas, creating structures from trees and fallen logs to survive the storms, finding out other parties have been airlifted, travelling 20km of rough trail every day to check the river levels, until finally it’s low enough to dare a crossing… When you get to a town pub, covered in mud, exhausted, out of calories, and they have 10 different parmis—one loaded with bacon—I’m in fucking heaven. Hell damn ass heaven.
A steak would never cut it.
I guess a chicken ceaser salad is actually just chicken nuggets because you’ve got croutons, chicken, sauce, and salad too.
chicken schnitzel is a chicken nugget for adults? Sure. I’ll let that truth stand.
But a chicken parmi? As in, a schnitzel covered in tomato pasta sauce, a slice of ham (or similar) and drowned in melted cheese? I dunno.
I think we’re going to have to draw the line at cheese making it an adult meal.
But here’s the most important part: no-one needs to grow up. You need to harden up, not grow up.
The fuck kinda parma you lot eating
What came first? Chicken parmesano or chicken nuggets?
Chicken parm, 1950s: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicken_parmesan
Chicken nuggets also 1950s: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Chicken_nugget&diffonly=true
However chicken milanesa (breaded chicken cutlets) has its origin at about 1200s: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Veal_Milanese&diffonly=true
So, in my opinion Chicken nuggets specifically came after chicken parm, since its recorded history dates much further back than an emulsified paste of poultry breaded and fried (dino shapes inclusive)
Therefore the kids versión is a riff off chicken parm and not the other way around, so you can feel better about that.
You’re doing the Lord’s work here.
Do/did any Europeans makes Milanesa with chicken?.. I’ve never seen it outside of Aus/US
Yeah but it’s called “pollo empanado” here because it’s not Italy.
Pedantic truth is best truth (here). Win.
Technically correct, the best kind of correct.
Yeah, that’s prior art there ;)
Here’s my controversial parmi take.
No, dad, the chicken parmi here isn’t “too dry”. Chicken parmi is always dry. It’s a terrible, dry food that has to be slathered in sauce to even be edible.
It’s a conclusion I reached after watching countless times where someone would order the chicken parma and go on to complain that it’s too dry. If one restaurant’s parma is too dry, they did a bad job. If every pub does parma that’s too dry, that’s the dish’s fault.
Oh no I’m not eating mature adult food with kale in it. Oh my god western civilization is crumbling because I ate boneless wings, a parmi, or had a drink that wasn’t matured for 50 years in a oak barrel.
Ridiculous.
As a yank who only knows the pasta version of this dish it took a bit of googling to get up to speed. So y’all took the pasta away and serve the chicken on its own, yeah? Not a bad idea.
Hope this guy gets all the troll-euphoria he can out of this but the “its a melt not a grilled cheese” rant will always be king
with chips and salad yes.
Have always said this. My preferred deep fried crumbed pub protein is a massive Weiner Schnitzel with gravy.
