When I speak, unless I’m sharing the screen I always keep looking at myself. It’s kind of strange – it clearly does not match a real-world conversation, but somehow I can’t help it.
Edit: More context – I’m wondering if others have it, if this is something that can be explained by some “brain” thing, and also how does it affect the conversation.
I combat this habit by placing a window over the top of whatever app I’m using for the video call so my eyes stay on the camera. That strategy is foiled the moment screen sharing becomes required, but more often than not I know exactly what they’re talking about. As I’ve never been on the receiving end of this strategy who knows if it makes me look better or like a weirdo…
both. I’ve recently realized that during our 1on1 calls my boss is “looking at me”, which always made me feel more listened, overall better.
I mentioned that on a different, informal call, like, “are you using some tricks…” and he told us he’s doing no tricks, it’s just that the camera happens to be close enough to the screen where he places the call window, and that’s a laptop which is far enough that the angular difference is negligent. So that made him look better.
(And I think it’s even better than looking at the camera; he was kinda looking at both, me & the camera.)
But I suspect that this can bite back quickly if you’re in a meeting with several people and say, for a minute you (say, Alex) are exchanging ideas with one person, say, Bob while others (Cathy, Dan) are listening. The weird part is that in Bob, Cathy and Dan’s visual experience you’re directly looking at them, which will seem natural to Bob, but strange to to Cathy and Dan since they know you’re talking to Bob right now so why the heck you keep peeking at them for so long, as if you want them to jump in to the convo or something…
If the situation was similar as I’ve described for my boss (smaller screen, further away), then it can even be affected by the way Cathy and Dan’s videos are arranged on your screen. Not all are going to be closest to the camera, only the closest one to the camera could feel an eye contact, but that’s not going to change according to who you are talking to. (There could be some technology or call UI design to help with that…)
Overall, I think with some video-calling experience people will generally adapt for the situation over time, but it may differ individually…