I work with a needy man, the kind of person who needs constant attention and feels threatened by silence. If I choose to read something on my phone instead of giving him attention he asks if everything’s all right. If I choose to meditate, adopting a yoga like position and closing my eyes before working he asks the same. It’s like he needs people talking to him constantly.

I am the opposite, I believe: I don’t talk about my life at work, I go there because I need a paycheck, but I’m open to learn from more knowledgeable colleagues, something he clearly is not.

What I’ve done so far: avoiding him, not looking him in the eye when he wants to talk to me, telling him that I’m working when he wants to talk to me, giving dull answers, feigning ignorance about several topics, ignoring him when I’m talking to another person and he asks what we’re talking about.

He still comes and sits next to me and tells me about his family, something I don’t care about.

I’m torn because I want to tell him to leave me alone, that I don’t care about his life, but considering the ‘offense’ this seems too much and knowing me I’d immediately regret it and feel bad about it.

Why am I like this?

  • fine_sandy_bottom@lemmy.federate.cc
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    48
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    10 days ago

    These sound like bread and butter small talk type work interactions.

    Just gonna be blunt… meditating at work and adopting a yoga like position is going to attract attention and will invite co-workers to enquire after your well being.

    If this guy is your biggest problem at work then you have a pretty great job.

    • Mothra@mander.xyz
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      9 days ago

      That depends on the type of work OP does and when exactly are they adopting the yoga stance. People can do whatever they want during breaks.

      But ultimately I agree with your last sentence.

      • fine_sandy_bottom@lemmy.federate.cc
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        9 days ago

        Of course people can do what they want during their breaks.

        What I’m getting at is, mediation or yoga in the break room is an unusual behavior and well meaning co-workers “just trying to be nice” will enquire after your well being.

        If you don’t want to interact with co-workers on your break, put your head phones on while you play with your phone.

        • Mothra@mander.xyz
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          9 days ago

          I totally see your point, which is why I mentioned this really depends on context. I’ve worked in places where people actually did stretches or meditation during their breaks and nobody cared for it. But I can totally see how that wouldn’t fly in other places.

          Also, from experience - some people will still talk to you even if you have headphones and your attention on the phone.