I love it when the tough guy alpha male MAGAts on various social media are so bad they self-censor words they know will get them banned.
Conversely, I hate how so many types of social media are self-censoring words because they’re trying not to lose views according to an algorithm. It demeans the terrible severity when someone talks about rape by calling it ‘grape’, for instance. ‘Unalived’ is the most fucking ridiculous one.
Now f**k off, or I’ll unpleasant you!
How the fuck are humans still alive?
Could’ve been worse. Could’ve been Steven Segal.
“I’m something of a hoarder myself … but only for this precious ring!”
"Mm! You! You … come to me! You come to me because … you’re mine, right? Precious! PRECIOUS! I’m talking to you!"
I’m in my fifties, but I’m still hip to what’s groovy. I know the name of the big artists. Uh … Wet Ass Pussy. The uh, those monitor head brothers … Around the World. Um … Billy Eyelash. The uh … the K-Pops!
I wish the monkeys would hurry the fuck up
JD Vance in the future: “Erica? Honey, where are my erection pants?!”
Alone in the basement, Adams was furiously whacking off with one hand, as he typed his Melania fanfic with the other.
‘I am settling in for a showing of ‘Melania’ and the theater is PACKED!’
“What else does this story need?” he whacked. “Oh, yes. Little girls!”
They don’t use it enough in the movies.
The Hand is still the safest way to not be squished … statistically speaking.
Angels: "Am I ever gonna see your face again?
Australia: “No way! Get fucked! Fuck off!”
Morrison: "Uh, well, actually, let me just say … "
Jokes on them! I’ve never been able to afford Apple products!
I’m just gonna put a happy little Bob Ross … right here.
Well, that sounds wonderful!
If we’re living in a simulation, can’t we just use clouds as RAM?
I thought that was a Law?
Pops knows what he likes and is living his best life.
I don’t see any Bear Spray …
Traditionally, a condom. But only for a decade or so. Just long enough for it to mark an eternal shape of dismal circumstance.