Any time I use the wrong definite article my German wife will loudly bark “NEIN!” It’s hot but educational.

Recipe: Add 1/4 cup of cheese.
Me: Adding 1 cup of cheese got it.

I’ve been thinking about making the switch. How difficult do you find it to play steam games on your setup?

Honey addiction is real and tearing our communities apart.

Like if it was slightly cold out there would be fluff available.

If we were lost in the wild this alpaca could take care of me.

A cheap method to unblock anything:

• Remove any loose material.
• Now pour 30 gallons of jet fuel in the area.
• Ignite it but stand back at least a few feet.

I thought canaries got carried into the mine as a punishment for the great canary uprising of 1742.

Shell shocked mosquito: There is a land lads, bristling with barbed wire so thick ye see not sun nor moon. Where ye go in to feed but may never return.

I say we divide the day into 100 sections. No reason really I just think it’d be cool to party until 100 o’clock.

This is why I’m so patient and calm when dealing with spoons.

Imagine him missing and shooting the inventor in the nards.

In paint be sure to make a bunch of random lines and then use the fill bucket to fill in random colors in the spaces.

Guten Tag my homies!

Me: Hey bank AI, how much money is in my account?
Bank AI: (long pause) It looks like there are five banks in your area.

Invite with HR Friday at 4pm.

This R2 unit has a bad motivator.

It’s Azumanga ichthys!

We are gathered here for it is the only opening in thy Outlook calendar.

Man, es ist harder and harder Lemmy posts zu read.